Arbitrary - Subjective - Nebulous - Conceptual - Capricious - abstract and Absurd 28% of the time ?
(And Whom really Gives a Bleepety Bleep anyhow) ?
For those whomever may give a freaking Bleep :
Perceptions - Beliefs - Religion
Emperor Constantine - arranged to have the Books of - Dennis and DueToAstronomy - REMOVED from The King James Bible version / historical accounting of events - after the original printing was found in an attic @ the corner of 12th Street and Vine ,
( discovered by some Crazy Little Women ) in Kansas City .
The unique collection was revered as sacred gnostic gossip - books from The Tavernacle ! -
specializing in :
10 - commandments
490 Ways To Forgive Idiots
And 50 Ways To leave Your Lover ,
(to be continued) by popular demand - (if You'll believe that) ?
We offer communion service @ sunrise (every 1st Sunday) @ The Tavernacle Church Of :
We Ain't Got a Freaking Clue -
serving a bloody Mary or 6 ounces of whidbey Island port Whine - a chunk of dark chocolate truffle and Englebert Pumpernickel bread
( You won't get that in your fundamental Blah Methodist or blah Baptist Church )
(we also play jug band music during the ceremony ) By The Nitty Gritty dust to dust band !
( later) will return soon ! Thanks for your patience - if you have any remaining ? Eh
That was Freaking Futility ! And Then we channeled the spirit of Carl Sagan ... We soon learned what Really Happened ! billions and billions of years ago - up to and including party night - Big Bang !
357 B C ...The True Creation Story !
Did you know that IF there is nothing new under the sun - there could be no such thing as " Original " Sin , but if there were - it would have had to happen @ night ? ... on a Big Bang -Saturday Night !
Suppose that the concept of Sin and punishment were to be repealed and replaced - with Error and Consequence ? And You could keep your own doctor ?
What If we were to discover Truth as it is relative to a greed based (non compassionate) attitude of the multi billion $$$$$$$$$$$$$ Animal Pharm ( H a r m ) aceutical Indu$try - having a bigger vested interest in Illness -rather than Prevention and Health -
a symptom treatment regiment , other than Cure ?
The prevention Song has been Sung ! But not by mainstream news sources !
Were you ever taught in Sunday school class - That Adam was cast into a deep sleep - Yes ? ...
Was it ever mentioned that he was never
Awakened from that condition ? ... NO !
How about deliberately designed distraction ( HollyWEIRD EnterTAINTment )
creating couch potatoes who tend to reproduce little propagandized - indoctrinated Zombi-like Tator Tots ? ... Eh ! ,
How about this ... Perhaps The human species is 1/2 past human - betwixt Ape and Angel - sequestered on a quarantined planet ?
and IF we were created in the Image and likeness - Then ,that God must have some serious detrimental features / attributes
And . how about that conveniently misinterpreted - misapplied Genesis scripture about "Dominion" ( taken literally ) ? The cause of Much Conflict ! ( To be continued) - ( later )
And clergy acting as you personal Travel Agency ? Employing the art of Ethos - Pathos - Logos ,... Issuing a passport !
To Obsequious (blindly obedient ) sychophants !
Let's not forget ... There are 10 Commandments / 490 ways to Forgive insipid Jack asses and Idiots , and ...
50 ways to leave your lover !
(51) if you have a private conversation with Professor Pompous ( PompAss ) E - merit Less
The famous bread prayer should go like this : ...Give us this day our daily Danish and chai tea !
For those who trespass :... Gouge their eyes - run their head into the turnbuckle ,
give them a flying drop kick and do a bombs away on their neck ! ( tell them, Next time - I will Hurt You ) !
And , regarding forgiveness : ... Forgive some ( a select few) of the Shallow NincomPoops some of the time ( even if they don't freaking deserve it ) ! - ( but don't put it in writing ) ( if you do, ... add, ... signed under extreme Duress , Sincerely Yours Freaking semi truly , with prejudice , Amen ! ( This will protect you against a class action lawsuit ) !
In The Year of "357" - There was a MAGNUM Event ! ... It was B C ( Before Condoms) - 'Big Bang" ! We saw the whole Gang ...It was long about a Saturday night ! Famous celebrities were among the guests @ The scene, - Lollipop - Peggy Sue - Long Tall Sally And Good Golly Miss Molly was even there too ! Bobby Darin hosted The Event ! ... (Jerry Lee ) played the piano ( there was a whole lot of shaking going on - and other things ) Chuck Berry sang about his Ding-a-Ling ! ... That was the night that Adam met Eve ! BOING !
Columbo was called to the scene ! ... There was some violence that evening also - a situational mystery ?... A Flipping out Flopping Bopping Teen stabbed an innocent by stander in the back - with Mack The Knife
( The case remains unsolved to this date )
( Paul Harvey tells the Rest Of The Story ... @ www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUWyODR1_sA )
Professor Pious has discovered a New SECT of religious philosophy : He has A very special - unique Sectuality ( and is Sectually Active ) and is willing to share - Genderously !
Pompous Pious is believed to have been a 55th cousin to Pontius Pilate and to have had incestual relations with Lady Godiva !
Under oath - Pompous Pious denied the allegation and swore that it was not his fault !
You won't find that TRUE Story in a Typical Sunday Sermon ! Professor Pompous Pious - Emeritus Also has The correctified version of Daniel and the Lion's Den - and The Truth About The mythical metaphorical Adam / Eve / and Noah !
Let Us Begin : The story , prior to redacting by emperor Constantine, told of : A Supreme Creative Diety - saying : "Let There be Light" ! Interesting ! ... However What was really said , was : " Let There be
DRUMS !( It was para diddle time in paradoxical Paradise ( we will return to this soon enough ) But first ... When Adam met Eve , she immediately became the Tantalyizing Apple of his Lustful Eye ( It's that Diety Damned - APPLE, ... Once again ! )
There suddenly , without warning , Appeared "A Big Boing" !
Eve said - : ...It's gruesome Adam ! ... Adam replied ;
Look again Eve - It just Grew Some more !
Adam called this thing his "Imagination " , and decided to ask her for a date to get to know her better , as his "imagination " Grew ! Adam could not speak up -as the Apple of his eye seemed to be stuck in his throat ( later to become known as Adam's Apple ! Adam decides that he must deal with
This Big Bad Boy - Bang Boing issue!
Adam consulted with the local
The Ting Tang - Walla Walla - Bing Bang - Witch Doctor
for advice on what to do - As his "Imagination" Grew !
(to be continued in the Springtime - when we hear the Robin sing)
Good Golly - Ollie - What About Noah ?
Noah , ? Ah ... - Oh My Good Gracious ... I guess we could call it
( Another "Wet" Dream ) - Stanley, and
Another Fine Mess ,.. It began with Noah bringing on to the Ark - a pair of *(*Diddles)
God began to play that fast and furious famous Drum Solo :
" Wipe Out "
( To Be continued , ...order your flood lights and return in The Spring - when we hear that Robin Sing )
* ( a 'paradiddle' - is a drum roll ) and the beat goes on !
And then The God's Of The Copybook Headings limped up to The Professor Pompous
Pious Pandemonium Podium - To Explain IT All Once More !
( Or Twice ) -
for shallow 1/2 wit Slobbering , Ignorant Apathetic - Complacent
First - Take 2 Jeremiah Peabody polyunsaturated - quick dissolving , fast acting pleasant tasting - green and purple pills - and a chunk of dark chocolate - chased with 6 ounces of Whidbey Island port Wine ( mighty fine Jeremiah bullfrog Wine ) from Washington State ! Walk thru the Valley Of The Shadow - from 2008 to 2016
Then - twirl dervishly - 7 full rotations - counter clockwise -
- Sit down - facing East ,
- Take 3 deep breaths ,
- Burn nag champa jasmine incense
- Chant (nam myoho renge kyo) - for 40 days and 40 Knights ,
This is The "Only" True Way
Everyone else belongs to some kind of Weird Cult - or Whatever ?
And for a Booster Shot follow-up treatment - Drive your chevy ( cherry red 53 ) to the Savannah levy -
have some cream and banana and listen to some jug band music ! This ought to make you feel just Fine !
A Machiavellian Methodology for Propagandized Indoctrination methodolgy
( rapid frame changes - focus modification ) - ( Hell's Conditioning ) ,
corporately sponsored - sanity compromising multi- tasking for Profit
( You are not told that In The Stanford MBA program - are you ?)
Ethos - Pathos - Logos and
The Machiavellian Monster Mash Means
of garnering loyalty !
Producing a hobbled mass of Worker Bees - with unquestioning blind and obedient Compliance
Say something interesting about your business here.
What's something exciting your business offers? Say it here.
Producing a hobbled mass of worker bees
( unquestioned blind obedience / Compliance )
Copyright © 2018 , Feb. 03 @ 6 a. m.
by The Web Of Life foundation
( Professor Pompous Pious - Emeritus Graciously Presiding -
*(c) - Don't spit in the wind - Don't tug on Superman"s cape -Don't pull the mask off the Lone Ranger - and Don't mess around with this Gem !
We will gouge your eyes - run your head into the turnbuckle - give you a flying drop kick and do a bombs away on your pencil neck ( Hulkamania Lives On )
Then we will haul your Fat ass into federal court and $ue your larcenous hardened heart for $1. 7 million $$$$$$$ , (in Judge Judy's courtroom - where she won't like You ) ! Got That ? Eh